Athlete or not, we all question ourselves.
Questioning makes you strong, completion of the task makes you stronger, figuring out the art of how to actually complete your goal makes you strongest.
So after one (+) years of playing with a new sport I have yet again re-realized the beauty of a good of challenge, adventure, and a great way to spend time with like-minded people while pushing myself to my absolute utmost - then figuring out how to complete the crazy goals I set myself...all to satisfy myself only.
After my untrained Seattle marathon in December, I humbly attempted to run the Deception Pass 50km race 2 weeks later....I stopped half way through the 50k as a mature response from the injuries that were festering in my hamstring step by step. This decision absolutely killed my ego in the moment. This decision has also proved to keep my body in check in the long run.
A few months later after seeing some amazing therapists Chiro/RMT respectively (Paul Wiggins and Clifford Yip in North Vancouver) in March, I ran the Chuckanut 50k - and bettered my time from last year by an 18 odd minutes. Satisfied.
My most recent attempt at an Ultra-marathon was 2 days ago is what sparked my Blog entry:
At Sun Mountain 50k this year I unfortunately explored that very deep dark place that so many people have been (whatever realm of life)....4 hours prior to the 50km trail running race, for some reason my body decided to completely evacuate itself as I involuntarily cleansed myself of all my insides. This is absolutely no ideal way to start an ultra leaving my dehydrated and lacking in energy.
With trepidation, I started the race. For first 2.5 hours (~25km) all I wanted to do was take my visor off because I thought it would make me less dizzy...but didn't have the energy to do anything but keep one foot in front of the other - and tried very hard to smile at any point in the process...
In that time knowing the human physiology very well, I pounded back 3 electrolyte tablets per hour over 3 hours, about 2 litres of fluid (EFS) and anything my stomach could handle (this was about 200 Kcal of sugar stuff and a honey waffer). All of a sudden at about 3 hours in I started feeling human again and embraced that for the rest of the run for the beauty of it.
I crossed that finish line with a smile on my face, I was 13 minutes slower than last year but am more proud of myself for working through my own battle and the sheer completion....I was so, so, so very close to throwing in the towel. Thankfully, I absorbed the energy of the other runners and embraced the bright faces (all of which had their own challenges going on) along the way.
Body is back in check, and am raring and ready for the next challenge (TRAILSTOKE 60k in July!)
This entry is for those who find that deep, dark place, wherever it is in life, there is always a way foreward; just keep your focus on the beauty of life, questioning the moments - completing your tasks and finding your own unique way toward your goals.